I get it. Meatloaf isn’t sexy. It’s what your mom made when she ran out of ideas and patience, usually served with instant mashed potatoes and frozen peas that rolled across your plate like tiny green deserters. But a properly made meatloaf is basically a giant hamburger loaf, and anyone […]
I didn’t set out to perfect chicken fried chicken. It just happened, like most of life’s questionable decisions, after a series of spectacular failures and one particularly memorable incident involving my ex-mother-in-law’s “famous” recipe that tasted like seasoned cardboard. You know the type – the kind of cooking that makes […]
I didn’t set out to become the banana pudding guy. It just happened, like most of life’s weird little twists. One minute you’re trying to impress your mother-in-law, and the next thing you know, you’re getting texts begging for the recipe. Now, we both know those sad, store-bought versions exist. […]
I’ve eaten enough mac and cheese to kill a small horse. From the blue box stuff that got me through college to the pretentious $32 “artisanal” version some hipster joint served me with truffle oil and gold flakes. Yeah, actual gold flakes. Like pasta needs jewelry. But this recipe? This […]
I’ve eaten enough chicken noodle soup to float a battleship. Most of it tastes like sad chicken took a bath in lukewarm depression. But this recipe? This is the real deal, the kind that makes you want to fake a cold just so someone will make it for you. Serves […]
There’s something deeply comforting about the fact that no matter how much the world burns around us, flour, butter, and chocolate will still combine to create something worth living for. These cookies won’t solve global warming or fix the economy, but they’ll make you forget about both for a solid […]
After spending three years in a relationship with someone who thought Taco Bell was authentic, I developed this recipe out of pure spite and survival instinct. It’s not your grandmother’s enchiladas, but it’s damn good enough to make you forget about every disappointing Mexican restaurant you’ve ever visited at 2am. […]
Serves 8-10 normal humans or 4-6 enthusiastic carb lovers I’ve probably made something like 3,000 lasagnas in my life. Not because I particularly love layering pasta sheets like some sort of bricklayer, but because every family gathering or “casual” dinner party seems to demand it. And after watching countless people […]
There are exactly two types of people in this world: those who think they make good chili, and those who actually do. I’ve spent twenty years bouncing between these two categories like a ping-pong ball in a tornado. It took a divorce, one burnt-down kitchen, and one particularly humbling chili […]
After spending years muttering profanities at complicated recipes, I started CarverCooks to write the kind of instructions I wish I'd had. I'm Karl, and I test everything until it's idiot-proof because I've been that idiot. No precious food stories, no lifestyle preaching – just solid recipes that won't make you want to throw your pan across the kitchen.
